The BIG Two Five

It’s definitely been awhile. But I think it’s time for a new post. I’m often asked, “How are you?” It’s typical to answer, without even thinking, “good”. Recently I’m trying to be more honest, but honestly, not many are prepared for any other answers, other than “good”.

How am I? I can’t tell you because I’m a bit confused myself. I can’t seem to find the words to describe what I’m feeling, but maybe it because I can’t even define it.

I do think it has a lot to do with the fact that in approx 2 more months I will be turning 25. I don’t know if you can relate to this when you turned 25. Like many people my age, I’m going through a life stage of transitional abyss. Not really knowing where I’ll end up, not knowing where I’m heading, but only knowing where I’ve come from [sometimes even losing my perspective on that]. I’m not even sure that I know where I am in life. Ever since graduation, the next step or next year in life has not been planned out like before. I like my jobs [restaurant and at the SA]. I find great satisfaction in helping my parents at the restaurant, knowing that they need me and that I can take part in their happiness. I also find great satisfaction in helping kids who, with many challenges, I’ve learned so much from. Before this job, I must admit that dealing with kids intimidated me, but with experience, I am more comfortable. I am a bit idealistic, so at certain days, I do feel like I’m making a difference and changing lives.

However, I know God has something else in store for me. I don’t know what it is at this moment, but all I know is that my heart still beats for something more, for missions, for travels, for a bigger picture, for the world. My current status is “stay”. I am longing for God to guide my path according to His purpose for me…step by step.

Waiting in uncertainty is definitely a daily struggle.

But I trust in the One who created me.

Birth - month 2010

Hello everyone. I’m back. Yes, I know I’ve been gone for awhile. I’ve been really busy. Family. Restaurant. Salvation Army. Ministry. Friends. Care group. Movies.

I was born in this month. Birth-month celebration means doing something that I’ve never done before, doing something that I won’t usually do, and doing something for those I care about.

April

1 - Thurs - *LA Galaxy vs Chivas USA with Cynthia and Stephanie. Go LA! Score 2-1.

2 - Fri - *Good Friday service, Pho with CG, Watch Angela’s film

3 - Sat - Sister birthday party

4 - Sun - Easter, Great worship, Thai New Year Festival in Hollywood, Coldstone

5 - Mon - Movie Marathon, ice cream

6 - Tues - Yoga!!

7 - Wed - Shopping @ forever 21, Subway, movie

8 - Thurs - Jamba Juice, Coffee and Tacos with Jennie, Sherlock Holmes

9 - Fri - Great CG, met the new friends from Australia. 

10 - Sat - Target, spend time with family, worship practice, JJs with cool ppl

11 - Sun - Great sunday service, Ps Chai announcement, Yogurtland, Mac Store in Old Pasadena, Mosaic service in Downtown LA, Kabuki (Old P) for Pear’s birthday…Great company, great memories.

12 - Mon - First day of Club 360. Good to see Thanh, Starbucks, worship practice of a lifetime, Tasty Garden

13 - Tues - Bad day. Learn a lot about myself. Slept.

14 - Wed - Went to Long Beach. Dinner with Aussies @ Face Cafe.

15 - Thurs - 1st Playoff Game (Kings vs Canucks) @ BJs with Tony, Cynthia, Stephanie

16 - Fri - Care group, Sophia’s testimony

17 - Sat - Worship practice, Thanh’s birthday dinner at Alondra’s, Cherry Blossom Festival with Ang, Steph, Steven, Joy. 2nd Game (Kings vs Canucks)

18 - Sun - Church, Lang Lang and the orchestra, dessert with Bao

19 - Mon - 3rd game @ Lampost Pizza (Kings vs Canucks)

20 - Tues - Stay home, practice bass, Glee and V

21 - Wed - HOCKEY PLAYOFFS @ Staples center! (Kings vs Canucks)

Hope to see you there!

Hope to see you there!

A call for a lower case “a” in artist

#3

Why does our society value Celebrities and Artists so much? Celebrities are often praised and considered above average. Many of them get away with the law easily. People have also put a higher value on Artists and Musicians (even those who are not famous). Sometimes people with artistic abilities are given a permission slip to be late, not pay their bills, have terrible attitudes and tempers, to be extra emotional or irrational, or treat other people badly.

The book, THRIVING AS AN ARTIST IN THE CHURCH, by Rory Noland explained it clearly. I would recommend this book to any creative person (artists, writers, painters, designers, photographers, singers, dancers, guitarists, stage designers etc.) whether you are in the church or not. I’m learning a lot. I also feel like someone understands me, as a creative person, and the inner struggles I face.

Anyways…

The reason why people praised Artists so much, according to the book, started early in history. At the dawn of the Renaissance in the early 1300s, an Artist’s stature became quickly elevated. Before this time, people didn’t care for Artists as much. During the Renaissance, there was an increase in demands for artistic works. The Roman Catholic Church also became a major benefactor of the arts. Artists compete with each other to perfect their art and in creating new and innovative paintings and music. They became local heroes. This was the first time that it possible to make a good living in the “fine arts”.

By the Romantic Period, in the early 1800s, Artists were even more praised and exalted. Some enjoyed the same status as an intellectual. Art became Art with a capital A and Artist with a capital A. “For the first time in history, a successful Artist was more likely than a scholar, priest, or scientist to be labeled a genius (15). The artistic temperament became viewed as mysterious, and a godlike quality. Since people began thinking of Artists as super humans and not of this world, the immoral, antisocial, and terrible temperamental behaviors of Artists were celebrated.

As Beethoven grew in popularity, he became notorious for his tempers, moods, rage, and for treating his friends terribly. However, people loved him and was “ready to help him in every way they could” (16). Likewise, the famous Poet, Percy Shelley, was known for his multiple love affairs and for lending lots of money from his friends without returning any. Even though few people would be allowed to behave like Shelley and Beethoven without facing serious consequences, but “because he was an artistic genius, his lack of character was excused” (17).

Carrying on to today, our society idolizes entertainers and artists. “They have become the new philosophers of our day” (17). Even though they might not have received a high education, but people value their opinions on every topic from religion to politics. We often place them on a high pedestal.

HOWEVER, as Christian artists, we must not carry this attitude and view of Artists, Musicians, Celebrities, and Writers into the church.

We need to be aware that every artist (including you) inherits this prideful mindset. If we are honest with ourselves and realize this, we can detect when we start to think of ourselves and other artists in a highly manner and control it. It will help us to understand that servanthood and humility don’t come easily to us. Therefore, we must work harder to constantly improve our character and attitude.

We should not carry around the permission slip that the world gives to Artists in our pocket and wave it around. We should not take the permission slip either, if someone gives it to us. We are no different than others. God is the only One, deserving to be put on a pedestal. In fact, we must understand that God has given us these artistic talents and gifts to bless and serve others, not so that we can be praised and be lifted up. Moreover, we should not show favoritism to Artists and idolized them, but show mercy to everyone without judgment (James 2:1-12).

This is a call for us to put a lower case “a” back in “artists” and keep the capital “G” in “God” and God alone.

Justice Prevails!

#2

JOB 8:3 “Does God pervert justice? Does the Almighty pervert what is right?”

On Saturday November 21,2009, my car was hit on my way to Mary Poppins. I was driving North on Hill St. and turned left (west) onto Temple St. in Los Angeles. I had completed my left turn into the lane closest to me (the left-most lane) and was driving straight in the left lane already when a black car made a wide right turn into my lane and struck me on the right side of my car (see diagram below). We pulled over near-by to look at the damages and exchanged information. My passenger front door was pushed in, but thank God the door still works. Also, some paint from the back passenger door and the front door came off. However, the black car had only a couple tiny scratches on the driver’s bumper corner.

I was very shocked by this hit. I can still remember seeing a black car coming way too close in the corner of my eye. I didn’t get a police report because she seem like a very nice lady. She got in her car and said that her insurance will take care of this.

After a couple of months of contacting my insurance company and her insurance back and forth, I found out that it’s taking longer because the black car was an rental car. The time of waiting and waiting for an answer and waiting and waiting for news of the situation was hard to bear. I couldn’t stop thinking of what will happen and how it will all turn out. It was even worst because this was during the holidays. I wanted to enjoy the holidays more, but I was worried.

I was even more worried when I talked to Ms. Black Car’s insurance company. I found out that Ms. Black Car’s story of the accident was that I had made a wide left turn into her car and struck her car. This is completely opposite of the truth. I was very saddened that someone would lie and divert the truth for their own benefit without thinking of how their false words would effect others.

I felt no one believed me and that the truth was forced to be hidden under a rug. I knew the truth that I didn’t hit her. But in the end, her story was accepted as the truth. They did not accept any liability for my damages and concluded that is was my fault. During this time of waiting, I knew that God allowed this to happen to teach me how it is like to feel injustice. I was accused for something I did not do. I felt like I had a tiny glimpse of people in the world who felt injustice or who lives in poverty. They did not do anything wrong but they were being oppressed. I know that my situation is NOTHING compare to those suffering in the world. But if I was going to help those who felt oppressed and injustice, I need to understand how they felt and what they were going through. With this experience, I feel like God has helped me understand a bit more. All I knew was that I had to trust in God still. I kept confessing to God that He is a God of Justice and Mercy. He would not let evil or injustice win. I trusted that God knew the truth and He would not pervert justice.

I thank God that my insurance company and claims person (James Dressler) believed me. Thank you James. He agreed that it isn’t my fault and put me down as nonchargeable. Therefore, my insurance coverage did not go up. Thank God for that! However, it took me awhile to accept the fact the truth is still under the rug. I still had a hard time accepting that I’m accused of something and that “lies” were winning.

I knew I had to fight to the end. How can I just give up and let lies and injustice win? If I wanted to fight for others in the world, I need to fight now for myself and for justice. So then, I wrote a heartfelt email to Ms. Black Car’s Insurance Company Headquarters to appeal the decision. The appeal process is that 3 anonymous people from Ms. Black Car’s Insurance Company would review the case again and come up with a conclusion. I knew that this may be difficult because politics and business is involved. Why would they want to spend money for my car if they didn’t have to? While waiting for a reply, I prayed and trusted that it is in God’s control.

Yesterday morning, I received a phone call from Ms. Black Car’s claims person (the lady who first denied the liability). She said that the conclusion of the appeal is that we will take FULL liability for your damages and will send you a check. After I hung up, I went crazy. I danced around, jumping up and down, screaming and shouting, using pillows as flags. GOD IS BEYOND AWESOME! There are no words to describe my excitement for this. God knew the truth and He did not let injustice win.

This is also a confirmation to me that, in future, fighting injustice may be difficult and overwhelming. There are so many problems in the world. I know He had put in my heart a passion for the broken, for people being oppressed, for the lost, for the helpless, and for those who need someone to fight for them. I don’t know how God is going to use me or where I will end up. But one thing I know for sure is that God is the God of Justice and of Compassion. He is in control of all situations. He will be with me, and will help me fight injustice. JUSTICE MUST PREVAIL!

Isaiah 58:18 “Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a GOD OF JUSTICE! Blessed are all who wait for Him.”

THANK YOU GOD!

"Though we travel the world to find the beautiful we must carry it with us or we find it not"
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
First Blog

Sunday 01.17.10

First blog.

Hi. I’m so glad you are reading this. The last blog I tried writing, stopped at 4 entries. Before that, my numerous tries at writing a journal for my future children to read, or for detectives to read in case something happens to me, or for me to read when I get old and forgetful had also failed. So the journal thing didn’t work, and the blogger thing didn’t work. After thinking about the reason for my lack of commitment to keeping up with a blog, I realized that writing about how my day went day to day is not exciting. If it’s not exciting for me to write about what kind of cereal I had this morning, or that I got gas today (for you who are laughing, let me clarify…fuel for my car), or what time I slept, then it’s probably not that exciting for you to read it. So with this tumblr blog, I decide that I will write down my inspirations, things I think about (which is A LOT) or things I notice about life, society, and the world. A huge portion of it will be revelations God has given me and mini-adventures God has taken me on. LIFE SHOULD BE AN ADVENTURE WITH GOD.

Let me introduce myself. You can call me Pao or Jamie or Laksupa. It’s complicated. My parents gave me the name Laksupa. I really like the name and its meaning. It means “good character” and this motivates me to live up to my name each day.

My last name contains 16 letters in English and yes everyone asked me to say it when they see it. This is what happens almost every time, I pay with my credit card or show my photo ID at anytime, whether to cashiers, government officials, credit card phone person, or even friends. People will look at the card, look at my face, then look at the card again as to make sure that there is no mistake. Then they must always attempt to say it. People find it amusing to butcher my name in front of me as I wait for them to do so while I’m in a hurry. Almost everyone struggles.

Them: “Chhhhhhhaaaaannnwwwweeedeeeeecha…um..ah…ah…raaaaaaaaakkkkkkkul??????”

Then they would look at me as to look for an approval of correctness.

Me: Oh that is close. Close enough.

Them: OH REALLY? (As if I had made their day)

Me: Yes. So….Should we…

Them: I was close? Can you say it? How do you say your last name?

Then I say it.

Them: Oh wow. What does it mean? How was it like growing up?

I wanted to say JUST LIKE THIS.

:-)

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